Malta votes for civil unions, non-discrimination for transgender individuals, mutual recognition

On Monday evening, the Parliament of Malta voted to allow same-sex couples to enter civil unions and adopt children; amend the constitution to forbid discrimination against transgender people; and ensure same-sex marriages conducted abroad would be recognised.

Civil unions

The Civil Unions Act amended Maltese law, allowing same-sex couples to enter partnerships with rights and duties similar to marriage. Partners will be able to adopt children.

Claudette Abela Baldacchino MEP, a Maltese member of the LGBT Intergroup, said: “Introducing civil unions was an important step towards fully embracing true European values. This is not merely a question of minority rights, but an issue of what kind of society we want to live in.”

“As an MEP, I believe respect for human rights and fundamental freedoms are the basis of any democracy. No country may call itself truly European unless it treats its citizens equally.”
Gender identity and sexual orientation in the Constitution

MPs also voted to amend the Constitution, prohibiting discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity. Malta is the first EU Member State to enshrine non-discrimination based on gender identity in its constitution.
Recognition of foreign marriages

The Civil Unions Act voted on Monday will also ensure that same-sex couples married or in a partnership from another country will see their union recognised in Malta.

Sophie in ‘t Veld MEP, Vice-President of the LGBT Intergroup, reacted: “I congratulate Malta for this very positive step. It’s particularly important that fellow lawmakers ensured unions conducted abroad would be recognised on Maltese soil.”

“The European Commission will perhaps see that this issue is of crucial importance. In these five years, it breached its own promise to work towards the mutual recognition of the effects of civil status documents. Thankfully, some Member States stopped waiting.”

Read more: HERE

5 Things It's Important To Consider Regarding Transphobia and 'RuPaul's Drag Race'

I am in full agreement with this post on the recent Rupaul uproar and the she-male comments during the Logo TV popular show featuring Miss Ru, GREGORY ROSEBRUGH of Bent a queer blog wrote an excellent piece on the issue to which I commented 

"Excellent post and balance to this matter, other places I have noticed an intolerant view of intolerance or plain misunderstanding as this faux pas has shown, I still luv Ru and mistakes will happen, some of our trans allies have forgotten the etymology of the terms used way before the raised visibility and understanding of transgender issues. We ought to take this one as a major learning curve.

Luv from Jamaica"

I have been waiting to see some less emotional responses to this latest faux pas and some balance as well bearing in mind the etymological root of this all and the term "she-male"

The entry read in part:

Recently, Rupaul Charles and the producers of Drag Race released a public statement in response to accusations of transphobia. It is worth noting that while Ru and Co. explain that they intend to tackle issues relating to transgender rights in the future of this show, they did not apologize to the transgender community for their offensive actions in the “Female or She-Male” mini-challenge.

Days after the statement from the Drag Race PR team, Carmen Carrera came forward about her stance on the “Female or She-Male” challenge and its implications for the treatment of transgender women in and out of the drag scene:

“Some of you guys asked me to make a comment so here it goes... 

Although I am certain RuPaul's Drag Race didn't mean to be offensive, let this be a learning experience. I think the show has opened up and educated the minds of many people who were ignorant to the world of drag and has made equality and respect a possibility for those involved, not only as equal beings but as phenomenal artists. 

There has always been a huge presence of trans artists in the drag scene. "Shemale" is an incredibly offensive term, and this whole business about if you can tell whether a woman is biological or not is getting kind of old. We live in a new world where understanding and acceptance are on the rise. Drag Race should be a little smarter about the terms they use and comprehend the fight for respect trans people are facing every minute of today. They should use their platform to educate their viewers truthfully on all facets of drag performance art. #SheHasSpoken”

In light of these events, and of the impassioned comments /bent has received from both sides of the issue, I feel it is necessary to provide clarity about my intentions in running my opinion piece about “Female or She-Male” a couple weeks ago. There are a number of things I want to clear the air about.

1) Dialogue is important. 

I do want to promote a dialogue about this show and its impact on the LGBTQ2I community. If someone does not agree with the opinions of this article, I and the editors of /bent of course encourage them to share their thoughts, as silence around the issue of transgender rights will also not create social change.

2) We can love the show while still pointing out its flaws. 

I still love this show, and I still love Rupaul. In fact, it is because I am a die-hard fan of Rupaul’s Drag Race that I had extreme difficulty viewing the “Female or She-Male” game. I do not feel comfortable viewing a show that I enjoy even as I know it promotes dangerous cultural practices in the community I belong to. 

This ambivalence is a difficult thing to constantly balance, but I know I would rather not pretend the show is politically pure and instead accept that there are dire representational problems in its creation. I do not think the solution is for offended viewers to stop watching the show, as that will not change its representational choices either.

3) We can love Rupaul while still pointing out his errors. 

I agree that Rupaul has done more for the LGBTQ2I community than I ever have. Thank you for that reminder, I totally forgot. For one, I will always remember Rupaul as a champion of AIDS activism in the early nineties, especially as the original face of Mac Viva Glam, a makeup line that donates one hundred percent of its profits to AIDS research. I think Rupaul ought to be acknowledged for the culturally relevant work he has done, especially for the drag community. However, I do not think these achievements should absolve Rupaul of responsibility for offensive actions he has committed.

4) Impact and intent are not the same. 

What this means is that regardless of whether or not the producers of Drag Race had intended to create an event that was transphobic or cis-centric, and whether or not Rupaul and Co. perceive themselves as transphobic (my guess is that they identify themselves as transgender advocates), the effect of this mini-challenge has been evidently harmful to the transgender community. For this reason alone the producers of Rupaul’s Drag Race should have said in their public statement something like, “We apologize for our actions, as we had not thought ahead about who in our community we were hurting by creating a game like “Female or She-Male”. We appreciate your feedback and intend to create programming that is safer for all our brothers and sisters.”

5) It’s not all about the language. 

My issue was primarily not as much to do with the word “She-Male” and who it belongs to, as much as the actual activity in the mini-challenge, which encouraged viewers to take apart women’s bodies based on how authentically “woman” they were. This was not just transphobic, but misogynist as well. This said, I do think it is easy to retire the term “She-Male” from drag culture, especially for the sake of our community members who it negatively affects.

ENDS

also see a post from 2013 on sister blog GLBTQ Jamaica on The difficult task of separating drag culture from transgender identity .......

Transgender Awareness Week: Taboo Yardies Screening in Kingston

As Transgender Awareness Week continues another activity that sought to raise awareness was conducted on November 16, 2013 in Kingston as arranged in conjunction with Aphrodite's P.R.I.D.E Jamaica: a transgender, lesbian and bisexual women's focused group that specializes in personal development and non advocacy LGBT matters with a view to developing the community in the populations. 

Taboo Yardies the documentary was screened as part of the thrust to raise Transgender awareness in the scheme of discussing LGBT issues with some focus on crisis reporting and this was a special edition as it was introduced to younger LGBTians who will in short order attend a series of workshops on self identity. 

Stake holders Quality Citizenship Jamaica co-founders Jalna Broderick and Angeline Jackson watched intently for the first time the film, both were featured in the production as well and contributed to the talk back session.

Selena Blake producer of the documentary Taboo Yardies who is Jamaican but resides in New York addresses persons who remained for the talk back section of the screening. It was animated discussion especially the response to Bruce Golding's section of the film which caused hisses in the room, see the clip of the former Prime Minister on his views on homosexuality in Jamaica.

Audience members on a short break at the venue as other speakers rose to present. Due to the limited capture policy I can show you shorts but the general gist of the activity for the day I hope is clear, the documentary was screened today in Montego Bay as well and Selena Blake departs for another screening date overseas.

The prep talk before the show

Transgender Jamaicans from the film covered their identity at the time of the filming in 2009/10

Members of the transgender community were also in attendance including co-chair of Aprohite's P.R.I.D.E Laura Garcia and yours truly as Community Outreach and Volunteer Co-ordinator and Miss Whitney (photo immediately above) one of the voices of the We are Jamaicans Campaign of JFLAG earlier this year, it was good to see her. 

Dwayne Jones' murder case that was featured in the documentary as a recent addition to the 2010 film was a major talking point as well during the talk back session as several concerns were raised as to how the matter was reported as a gay murder by the advocacies and advocates with international glitz like alarmist communication when the victim was transgender and to which some questioned the accuracy and honesty linked to crisis reporting and credibility of same in the thrust for rights and recognition. The visibility of the transgender community is becoming more pronounced which is good.

Also see the previous screening in Jamaica earlier this year in February: Highlights from Taboo Yardies Documentary screening in Jamaica

For a historical context from 2010 see the original release information here: 'Taboo Yardies' documentary to hit the streets in November

Peace and tolerance

H

Transgender Awareness Week 2013 ..........

from last year's post: 

Continued Trans erasure/invisibility by Jamaican advocates ..............

Our friends at JFLAG still have not yet updated or stepped up the transgender community's page on their website to reflect the changes in image in advocacy as it ought to be done, earlier this year in their "We are Jamaicans" campaign however some attempt was made to bring some faces to the scene but it never went much further. Viewship numbers ought to be larger but I guess the resistance from the Jamaican audience coupled with JFLAG's own credibility issues may have some effect on the sluggish interest. The Videos were one by Whitney and Tiana Miller below and they were brave to come out and become faces for a mostly invisible group under the LGBT umbrella. 

Laura Garcia has made some appearance such as on the BBC recently in the Gay divide documentary and Taboo Yardies to be screened in Jamaica this very weekend again in Kingston and Montego Bay. 

also we can recall the demise of young Dwayne Jones aka Gully Queen at 16 years of age sadly more so due to inexperience in navigating transwomanhood or the female cisgender imperative that was imminent but lost her life due to misaligned homophobia as the ignorant crowd mistook the cross dress appearance as deception to nab heterosexual men which is a real fear for some in Jamaica. Sadly the crisis reporting and the zeal at which some advocates milked the story missed the underlined factors of pre-operative trans persons and their gender issues in navigating everyday life, when who was to teach young Dwayne the ropes? Instead the case was for the most part treated as a homophobic one.

Here is the last video of Dwayne Jones aka Gully Queen inadvertently done by a television crew when they came across the homeless youths at an abandoned housing scheme in Western Jamaica, little did we know in death he would make such international headlines. He is to be remembered on November 20th International Transgender Day of Remembrance and a proposed homeless shelter for youths is named Dwayne's House somewhere soon. 

Meanwhile small entities such as Aphrodite's PRIDE Jamaica have been making inroads quietly on the ground with leading trans advocate Laura Garcia as Co-chair and others in self development workshops and sessions on transitioning, hormone therapy, sexual reassignment surgery and so on and it is hoped that as the momentum grows it will pick up and reach more persons who qualify for such interventions.

Posts on transgender matters can be found on my blogs as well. See: HERE

Peace and tolerance

H

UK court convicts teen for non disclosure of trans status prior to penetration

A case that got my attention from a Facebook thread in a Transgender group I am a member of has come to an end with some strange results, here a leading UK trans advocate has laid the case for us to look at, shared via creative commons license as per (re)use policy set out.

Zoe O'Connell 

The Court of Appeal has just published it’s judgement in the latest sex-by-deception case. This is, to the best of my knowledge, the first time a written judgement has been provided in such a case and is binding on the lower courts, i.e. creating case law.

It’s not good news.

As I’m quoting direct from the judgement, the below contains detailed references to sexual acts. This is unavoidable as it is highly relevant. There are no references to underage or non-consensual acts, the case revolves entirely around “deception” as to gender invalidating consent.

I’m going to quote extensively from the judgement as I believe it speaks for itself However, you can skip the quotes and just read my summary and it should make sense. What I will note is the heavy and unnecessary use of quote marks to imply deception earlier on: ‘him’, ‘his’ etc. This is despite the note from the judge towards the end about “confusion with her own sexuality”, specific reference to the person concerned “talking about wanting a sex change” and a pre-sentence report revealing “a history of…confusion surrounding her gender identity”.

The judge’s way of phrasing things could at best be described as insensitive and I suspect they had no training in this area.

6. Arrangements were made for “Scott” to come down to London to see M just after her 16th birthday…

7. …at the time the appellant was aged 17 years…

Summary: There was no issue with age of consent. (Quite the opposite, they waited until they were old enough)

8. … They went to a bedroom where it was dark and the appellant began to rub M’s vagina with her fingers and gave her oral sex. … M offered to give the appellant oral sex but the appellant declined. It was alleged (this being the count that was denied and not pursued) that M was penetrated with the dildo.

9. On the second visit, there were lots of occasions of oral penetration and occasions of digital penetration, always of M. … On the third visit, although there were difficulties in the relationship, they had a party. They still talked about having sex but the appellant was not interested in trying again.

Summary: There was genital contact and penetration with tongue and fingers. There was no penetration with a dildo or any confusion/lack of clarity over what it was penetration was with considered in the case. This is important: There was no “penis-in-vagina” sex involved in the case.

10. However on the fourth and final visit in November 2011, the appellant was confronted by M’s mother about really being a girl. … The appellant kept talking about wanting a sex change and M said the appellant had lied to her for four years and all that time she had been calling her Scott.

47. …The pre-sentence report spoke of a history of self harm and confusion surrounding her gender identity and sexuality, which were resolving….

Summary: There’s clear confusion over gender here. Talking about wanting a sex change is enough to get protection as a trans person under the Equalities Act 2010.

23. The case for the Crown was that M’s consent was obtained by fraudulent deception that the appellant was a male and that had she known the truth, she would not have consented to acts of vaginal penetration. Mr Wainwright argues that deception as to gender cannot vitiate consent; in the same way deception as to age, marital status, wealth or, following EB, HIV status being deceptions as to qualities or attributes cannot vitiate consent.

A little confusing this, but in a nutshell: It has been ruled previously that deception over age, marital status, wealth or HIV status does not matter.

26. Thus while, in a physical sense, the acts of assault by penetration of the vagina are the same whether perpetrated by a male or a female, the sexual nature of the acts is, on any common sense view, different where the complainant is deliberately deceived by a defendant into believing that the latter is a male. Assuming the facts to be proved as alleged, M chose to have sexual encounters with a boy and her preference (her freedom to choose whether or not to have a sexual encounter with a girl) was removed by the appellant’s deception.

Summary: Gender is somehow special because, presumably, “eww, gay people” and “eww, you turned me gay”. Homophobia as much as transphobia. “Deception” when it relates to gender does matter, even if primary sexual characteristics (Vagina/Penis) are not involved. As far as I’m aware there has never been a case in the UK involving deception as to religion, which would be an interesting comparison as it can involve strong emotions too.

Age, marital status, wealth or HIV status do not matter. Gender does.

11. …On 30 November 2011, M gave a full account to police of these offences. Although one or two answers might be said to be equivocal, she said that she did not know that “Scott” was a girl…

12. The account which the appellant provided to the police in a prepared statement was to the effect that she met M through the internet, pretending to be “Scott” because it made her more comfortable. She suggested that M found out about her real identity as early as December 2009 and they had a big argument. They eventually started speaking again and then met up. She expressed the view that she thought that the complainant knew or suspected that the appellant was a girl. That suspicion would be inconsistent with the suggestion of an argument when M found out; neither would it be consistent with M’s purchase of condoms before the first visit and preparation for it in 2011.

30. The draft witness statement re-iterated that the appellant had lost contact with M around Christmas 2009, noting that it was resumed when M requested pictures via a webcam for which purpose the appellant made herself look like a boy. The statement goes on to say that when the appellant travelled to London, she did not try to disguise herself as a boy and continued with these words:

“12. I presumed Monique knew that I was a girl and consented to sexual activity which took place although I specifically deny I ever used a dildo on her. I admit I had a dildo which she saw but I did not use it on her.“

Summary: The judgement goes on at length beyond this and is also concerned with the accuracy of legal advice given, but there appears to have been some doubt as to how aware M was about the gender situation. Given they were both teenagers, possibly confused about sexuality and on one side gender, this perhaps isn’t surprising.

Essentially it goes on to say that although the burden of proof is with the prosecution, if you’re trans and out yourself to someone prior to any sort of sexual act – even touching – then it would be best if you can prove it, in case they (or their parents) later try to prosecute. A Gender Recognition Certificate would, I hope, be a defense – but having read the judgement, I’m not certain.

Quite how you prove you told a partner without outing yourself to all and sundry, putting yourself at risk of physical violence, loss of employment, homelessness etc is not addressed in the judgement.

Black Transmen, Inc. Spring Newsletter

Now let's take a look at the recently concluded Black Transmen Conference held in the United States where one of my transgender allies Monica Roberts made the keynote address as well. She also added this piece via her blog:

BTMI 2013-The End And The Beginning Of Something Special

by Monica Roberts

(excerpted from her TransGriot blog post from Monday, March 18, 2013)

Carter and Esperanza Brown have taken that trans conference idea to the next level and given it the fierce urgency of a movement. The Black Transmen, Inc. Conference and Retreat started last year in Dallas was wildly successful and this year moved to a larger hotel where the conference can grow and evolve.

BTMI is dedicated toward the goals of not only dispelling myths and lies about the Black trans masculine community, but building better Black men period. I also left Dallas with a much better understanding of the challenges our trans brothers have to navigate and their issue concerns. Some of those are similar to what Black trans women have to deal with in terms of accessing medical care while trans, while others are unique to the trans masculine community. I got to simply listen to the brothers talkabout those issues and their concerns in the seminars and watch them over the past few days build a community.

The brothers are stepping up their leadership game. You will see some amazing things involving the Black trans masculine community happen over the next few years. They are determined to live up to the BTMI motto of being the change you want to see in the world. One thing they let me know they were concerned about is the off the charts violence we trans women are experiencing and they wanted to do a better job of standing up and raising their collective voices against it.

I was honored to be in the house to witness this second BTMI conference, and was sad when the time came for me to head back to my life in Houston. The closing faith service punctuated that four marvelous days had passed.

We need to support BTMI and this conference with our t-bills. Slide them a $5, $10 a $20 or whatever you can afford on a regular basis so that this organization can continue to put on this high quality conference and expand programming. BTMI 2013 is over and headed to our history books. I hope you folks who couldn't be here for the second edition of this conference will make it your business to be with your brothers for the third edition in 2014.

download the PDF HERE

Being Transgender Is No Longer A Mental Disorder ?...............

UPDATE 06/12/12 - Maybe, at least not yet for some ......... 

Firstly, Last Saturday, the American Psychiatric Association board of trustees approved the latest proposed revisions to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, what will now be known as the DSM-V. This marks a historic milestone for people who are transgender and gender non-conforming, as their identities are no longer classified as a mental disorder. Homosexuality was similarly declassified as a mental disorder in 1973.

Until now, the term “gender identity disorder” has been used to diagnose people who are transgender. For conservatives, this has provided rhetorical carte blanche to describe the entire trans committee as disordered, delusional, and mentally ill. In some cases, this diagnosis has even been used to discriminate against trans people, with claims that they are unfit parents or employees, as examples. On the other hand, insurance companies have been more willing to cover the expenses associated with transition under this language, because treatment for a disorder is considered medically necessary, rather than cosmetic.

The new manual will diagnose transgender people with “Gender Dysphoria,” which communicates the emotional distress that can result from “a marked incongruence between one’s experienced/expressed gender and assigned gender.” This will allow for affirmative treatment and transition care without the stigma of disorder. Earlier this year, the APA also released new health guidelines for transgender patients, as well as a position statement affirming transgender care and civil rights. Both documents align with a new standard for respecting trans people in the medical community.

It was only after homosexuality was declassified as a mental disorder that ex-gay ministries formed, protesting the medical community’s decision to affirm non-heterosexual orientations. Some dangerous ex-trans ministries exist already and are championed by Focus on the Family, NARTH, PFOX, and other anti-LGBT organizations. It’s possible that these efforts may similarly increase in the wake of this DSM revision. (Think Progress) 

Some transgender advocates see this change in the DSM-V as an important step to removing stigma against transgender people based on false stereotypes about gender identity and expression, as well as the word “disorder.” Transgender people are no longer subject to a lifelong default diagnosis of their mental health. This change follows previous statements from the APA on mental healthcare for transgender people. However, other transgender advocates note the barriers this change may create to accessing health insurance coverage for trans-related medical care, which could already be prohibitively expensive even before the change.

But in an update on TransGriot December 6, 2012 there seems to be some unease within the US trans activist community as the following will bring to bear: some people are contending the trans group didn't get depathologized and in fact the trans community is in an even worse position than they were in previously?

From Naomi Fontanos, executive director of Ganda Filipinas who also sits on the board of World Professional Association for Transgender Health, WPATH:

"To my friends who are asking about the confusing reports about the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) V of the American Psychiatric Association (APA). Here are the facts:

1. Gender Identity Disorder (GID) will only be replaced with a new name, Gender Dysphoria (GD), which is still classified as a sexual disorder in the DSM. GD will still be used to psychopathologize transgender and gender diverse people of all ages including children.

2. GID was not delisted from the DSM like homosexuality was delisted in 1973.

3. The DSM V will also include Transvestic Disorder that will replace Transvestic Fetishisim. Transvestic Disorder will include anyone who engages in sexual activity and wears the clothing of the gender that one was NOT ASSIGNED to him or her at birth. This diagnosis affects a large portion of transcommunities around the world.

Until GD is removed from the DSM, the fight to depsychopathologize the humanity of transgender people continues!"

Kelley Winters, who has been fighting the GID reform battle for years, had this to say: in her post breaking down the gender diagnoses "Despite retention of the unconscionable Transvestic Disorder category, I believe that the Gender Dysphoria category revisions in the DSM-5 will bring some long-awaited forward progress to trans and transsexual people facing barriers to social and medical transition. I hope that much more progress will follow."

Julia Serano also commented on the DSM-5 controversy.

Earlier this year the APA did offer a new position on transgender care as well, CLICK HERE from GLBTQJA.

Please see as well: Trans Depathologization: the spark of change

Also being watched closely by some activists overseas is the Jenna Talackova mission along with transpeople around the world to get Gender Identity Disorder removed from the next edition World Health Organization's ICD manual.

The International Classification of Diseases manual fight is important because insurance companies use ICD diagnostic codes when it comes time to bill for medical services performed. The renaming of Gender Identity Disorder to the proposed 'Gender Dysphoria' in the imminent publication of the DSM-V manual has also led to international trans activist efforts to get this done before the projected ICD-11 publishing date in 2015.

Here's Jenna's video and a link to her petition calling on the WHO to remove GID from the ICD-11 ..

France in 2010 became the first country to remove transsexuality from its list of mental disorders. The European Parliament in a September 28, 2011 resolution called for the WHO to withdraw gender identity disorders from the list of mental and behavoral disorders, and to ensure a non-pathologising reclassification in the negotiations on the 11th version of the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11).

Ugandan Trans Woman's Open Letter To Parliament

In agreeing with TransGriot's Note: As a transgender child of the African Diaspora, this 'Kill the Gays' bill is my business as well. I'm sad and disgusted to say it was pushed by white American christobigots and does affect trans people who live in Uganda. A Ugandan trans woman wrote this letter asking her members of Parliament to reject the so-called "kill the gays" bill.

Dear Honorables,

I greet you all in your distinguished capacities. I have never even for a second thought that I would ever have to write a letter to parliament, that my words would even have to be read by a people as you. I find myself, though, at a point in my life, where fate — if you believe in it — has bestowed upon me this duty to speak for the many voiceless out there, who like myself, find themselves at a point where your decision will determine if they will get to take another breath in this country, as free citizens or not. I pray then, that my words may not be in vain, but that they may appeal to that humanity that I know lies at the core of each of you.

I go by the alias of Cleo. I am a 26-year-old transgendered person. With my ambitious persona and insatiable thirst for knowledge, I’ve managed to see myself through school to the post-graduate level. I am a public worker, a scientist and a researcher to be specific, and earn an honest living from that. I am a Pentecostal Christian, loving God, though with my liberalist and realist values, I respect other people’s sentiments, however divergent they are from my own.

I was born a biologically male child to two very loving parents, Batooro by decent. Despite the love and care that they bestowed upon me, my childhood was tainted with a lot of misery. Being a transgender person, with my atypical behavior, and dress code that seemed to clash terribly with the stereotypical gender requirements of my society, I was faced with a lot of rejection from friends and family alike.

My family and friends have — with time and a lot of patience and struggle — come to understand my situation and not to judge me. A few months ago, when I made a monumental decision to fully transition into a girl, they have shown me so much affection and support, especially psychologically. For me, I consider this [one of] the biggest successes in my life; That my family and friends, despite our divergent values and their earlier negative sentiments, have finally managed, through a very strenuous process — that I should say, was not without wounds and tears — to understand and accept me, as a person, as their child, as their friend, as their sibling. Because that is the basic essence of what brings us together.

Being a transgendered person is not about who I am attracted to sexually. It's about what gender I identify with. Being a trans girl means that I was born biologically male, but with the physiology and psychology of a girl. At puberty I experienced a male, but largely female, pubertal development that left me very confused and rejected in all my social circles, for I was the black sheep. My parents did not know whether to protect me from boys or girls, but finally it so happened that I was brought up in a girls’ hostel up to the age of 15.
Growing up a transgender person meant that I had to deal with my teenage burdens alone with not a soul to tell — not my parents or peers or siblings — to disclose my darkest secrets. To cry myself to sleep every night, wishing I was dead, to battle with depression and suicidal tendencies — that’s all I remember in my teenage life.

I wonder then, why people say it was my choice to be this way. Why would anyone choose a life as lonely as this, a life of misery, pain, rejection, abuse and depression? And though I made it, many haven’t, because their self-esteem, their confidence, and their vitality, fails them in light of all the negativities that surround them. It’s hardly the disgustingly abusive world that the media paints of us, for if there is any abuse sustained even then by any party, it’s by us.

I ask myself, how one can judge me, before one even knows me. I understand this though, because for so long I was hated by people before they even knew me.

Being transgender, like being gay or a lesbian, is not a choice. What is rather a choice is accepting it for a fact. What is a choice is if you — at some point in life —decide to not live a masked life, under the guise of a straight, or asexual person like I did, and restrain yourself, from everything that you know you are from the core of your being.

It is very hard living your life through other people’s eyes; trying hard to make them happy while you restrain yourself of who you are, or even demonize your actual being because of their negativities. It's a strange reality that I can loosely liken to solitude in a crowd, for even though there were so many people around me, none of them knew me for who I was — for I deliberately concealed a part of me that I considered a flaw to my being.

At some point though, I realized, just like everyone does in life, that I could not live entirely on other people’s perceptions of who I was, battling to make other people happy at my own life’s expense. For we all have but one life to live. I came to the realization that I alone knew better who I was, and that I had a rare opportunity to let people know who I was, and not let them tell me who I was. It had been a sad existence of existing, but not quite living, of living a lie, trying to convince myself —and ultimately others — what I was, what I wasn’t, and I was determined to end that cycle.

As a transgender person, I envision a utopia of gender neutrality, where all the genders in all their entireties are able to coexist together, and live in utter harmony and mutual respect of one another. So that, if not to accept, they might tolerate each other, just like we have tried to do as people of different tribes, colors, religions, value systems and races; it’s the measure of our maturity as a civilization.

I believe then, that in the same regard that all diversities — racial, tribal, religious, sexual, and gender alike — instead of being criminalized and demonized, should be celebrated and empowered, so that rather than to condemn a sect of a few people to social redundancy, all the human resource that Uganda boasts of can be fully tapped.

Let’s not then condemn ourselves, so that when people in the future look back at us, they will do so, just like we do at our ancestors, and exclaim how inhuman and selfish they were to disregard the existence of a few people because of their color and race. Gender diversity and sexual orientation is no premise to crucify someone, just because you do not agree with how someone dresses, what they act like, or who they sleep with.

What then, I ask myself, are we teaching the future generations? Morality even at the expense of life? Morality in the eyes of a few self-righteous people? That all people aren’t the same, if they are different? That it is okay to be selfish?

But being transgender — as much as it is my gender identity — does not holistically define who I am.
As people, like facets of a gem, we are complex in our ambitions and aspirations. We are unique in our personalities, talents, and value systems. It is these things in their entirety, but none of them in unison of others that defines us. The binary reductionist paradigm of looking at life as being either black or white — rather than as a continuum of several shades — fails to address the issues of life as it is. I am only different because I am transgender, but other than that, I am human, with red blood coursing through my veins just like you, with family and friends that care for me deeply, with personal sentiments and feeling like you do. I cry and laugh like you do, but I cannot be reduced and labeled as transgender, as an item on a supermarket stall, because that’s not all I am. As a person, I am more than that.

Being transgender and having been rejected most of my life has taught serenity in the storm. It has taught perseverance, even when the storm wails on. It has taught me to respect other people despite their differences, and has taught me to be patient. It has taught me that life is not about being perfect, because in our flaws, in all our insecurities and in our inadequacies, we all have something to offer on the table. And that we are meant, as humans, to shine together, but not in solitude. And that we must help our brothers and sisters to shine, but not to trample upon them. To exist and live together, that is what humanity was meant for. For no man or woman is an island. For alone we burn out, and fail, but together we flourish.
Finally, we must not forget our ultimate calling and obligation. For by virtue of our humanity, we ought to love others like we love ourselves, and treat them with the same delicacy and sensitivity that we wish be accorded us.

I pray then, that in your deliberations, by the power vested in you, you may not forget our concerns — as humans, as Ugandans, as your brothers, sisters, mother and fathers.

With respect,
Cleo. K.